Young, Married, Best Decision.

What I’ve learned about being a young wife in today’s world is this:

your marriage is more important than going out Friday night.

your husband is truly your best friend.

you will lose friends due to the fact you are a team and you stand by your teammate.

your relationship with your husband should be your top priority.

starting a family is not as easy as it sounds.

love takes on a whole new meaning once married.

fights don’t end in breakups anymore, they should end in I’m sorry’s, I love you’s, and lets never go to bed angry at each other.

people will tell you, “You’re married. You don’t understand.” Even though once upon a time you were single (insert eye roll + face palm here)

you will pray for your single female friends even more to find the man of their dreams + a man who respects them, sees their true beauty, and who deserves them.

you will want to start a wife club – i know i do hahahaha

you will feel lonely at times and the comfort of your spouse is the best cure

the romance shouldn’t stop but be multiplied.

never stop going out on dates.

never stop pursuing your spouse.

the sweet gifts you used to give each other during the honeymoon phase might be fewer in between, but they now mean so much more.

the Lord always provides.

when the world tells you that you aren’t beautiful, you come home every night to someone who thinks you are too beautiful for the world.

a warm body next to you during winter nights helps you sleep easier.

and most importantly, I’ve learned that being young + married was the best choice I ever made. Even though there will always be voices around me giving me a hard time for becoming a wife so young, I know that saying yes to Anthony is a better life than I would have had alone. I’m beyond thankful for my husband and the love we share. The Lord is good my friends and He has created someone special for each and every one of us in the right timing.

 

Are you a young wife? Let’s chat! I would love to hear your love story. Or maybe you’re in a serious relationship and you’re about to become engaged, currently engaged, whatever it may be! I would love to hear from you + chat about what you’ve learned from being a young wife in this world today.

 

xoxo, Bryce

 

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This Ones For The Girls: Part Two

As stated in Part One of this two-part blog post, I promise to be very open and honest with you all. I have always found that it’s so much easier for me to communicate my inner most feelings through writing. I’m very uncomfortable with confrontation and talking face to face with people is extremely scary to me. That’s why I journal because I can tell empty pages all day long how I’m feeling and I won’t be judged back.

I noticed on Facebook the other day that so many women were participating in the “Me too” movement. It was very hard to see post after post of women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted at one point in their lives. Especially when it was women that I’ve been surrounded by my entire life. I was very grateful for their honesty and that they were able to put themselves out there and be heard. So, I thought I should be honest as well.

ME TOO.

It was five months or so after my boyfriend had broken up with me. I was still in complete shambles and I was trying to find “love” anywhere I could. He was my first love and losing him was one of the hardest things I had ever had to get over. Believe me, I was one of those girls who posted sad quotes about heartbreak and I vented about my sorrows like a broken record player. It was day after day that I would just feel like the sun would never rise again. When I look back now I see how dramatic I had made everyday life for myself. I also look back and see how I allowed my broken self be torn apart even more by other guys who didn’t really care about mending me.

This is my story:

It was five months or so after my boyfriend had broken up with me. It was a chilly Saturday afternoon and I remember wearing my black Nike compression jacket. It was tight and it showed how tiny I was underneath. When the boy texted me to come over and that he was alone, chills went up my spine. They were of excitement and also of very needy self-esteem boosting. I had been feeling like no one would ever bat an eye at me again. I was in desperate need of someone to hold me and tell me that I was worth something. I went over and he was right, there was absolutely no one home but us two. First we were just watching tv in his room, both of us on his bed and I was smart enough to know that this was probably not where I should be, but I was dumb enough to stay.

We kissed, a lot. I was ok with that. I had missed being kissed and I was comfortable with this boy. We had “dated” before and he was always a gentleman back then. So kissing him was familiar. But then things were moving so fast and I felt like I was having an outer body experience. I could see him holding me down and I could feel my heart racing. But it wasn’t racing because of excitement, it was racing with fear and with nerves. I then see him pulling my pants down and I can tell by my face that I’m not ok with that but somehow the words can’t form to say, “stop.” Then it happens and I swear during that outer body experience I look into my own eyes and we both know exactly what just happened. My body slumps and my eyes tear up. I can’t say anything because keeping quiet might make it end sooner. I just go numb from head to toe. Eventually I’m able to get up and I shakily pull my pants back up. He tells me to go home. I’m running out to my car, and as soon as I get in and shut the door to my jeep, the tears pour. I had never cried like that. It wasn’t the same kind of sobbing that I had done when I was dumped. It was the kind of sobbing where you know something bad has just happened and it’s mixed with the sobbing of embarrassment. Can you believe that I was embarrassed of what just happened, even though I had no control? I was the victim yet I was the one feeling completely sorry. I drove home and I felt like every car passing me knew. I felt dirty. I showered immediately and I just sunk in the tub and cried. The water washing my body but it wasn’t washing the images from my brain. I felt burnt. Like the images were burning themselves into my head and the feeling of being worthless burned into my heart. How could this sweet kid I knew be this controlling and heartless monster?

I didn’t tell anyone. I deleted his number and I just went on with my life. I never wanted anyone to ever know what had happened to me that Saturday night. Every time I see him now I feel this sense of fear rush over me. I wish I was so tiny that I could just hide and he would never see me. But instead, he always smiles at me. Every single time. Like he knows that we have this moment together and that we can’t ever erase it. A history that will never be unknown.

I felt in that moment after it happened that I was this filthy and unworthy human. I felt like I was just this bag of bones and flesh and that he didn’t see anything but this lifeless body that he could do whatever he so chose with. I felt like I was never the same again when it came to interacting with people. The way someone would reach out to me and I would flinch or the way someone would brush up against me on accident and I felt trapped.

As a Christian woman, this was really hard for me to come to terms with. I had to accept that I had made the choice to go over to his house and I asked the Lord to forgive me. I knew that God’s heart ached with me and that He still loved me no matter what. He knew that I was worthy of being loved and that I still am to this day. When I would start to think about how awful of a person I was because of that incident, the Lord would tell me, “You are beautiful. For you are fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalms 139:14. And when I would feel helpless, the Lord would say, “For I am the Lord of God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you” Isaiah 41:13.

And for those for you who might be thinking that due to the past, that you are filthy or that you are undervalued, I am here to tell you to stop. Stop thinking that you are at fault. Stop thinking that no one will ever love you because of your past. I’m here to tell you that YOU ARE LOVED. You’re not only loved by me and by the Lord, but someone out there is going to love you no matter what. Someone out there is exactly what you’re going to need to rebuild yourself and they are going to help you love yourself again. It might be a family member, a friend, or the TRUE love of your life. That person is going to see the shambles, the hurt, the fear, and they will see that those are merely scrapes and that scrapes can heal. I’m here today to tell you as well, to let those people help you. Don’t feel like you have to hide forever and that you have to feel that way forever.

I never thought that I would find someone who would sit down and let me tell them every bump and bruise of my life and still be there the next day. But I did and you can too.

Ladies, we are all in this together and we are all very valuable.

This One Is For The Girls: Part One

When I first started out blogging I had another website called The Little Padilla Wife. This post is from that site and I will actually be adding on to it in another post.

But without further to do..

Part One:

This post is for the girls who never thought they were noticed. Whether that be by the boy you had a massive crush on from freshman to senior year or it be the teacher who never saw your full potential as a student. Or perhaps you were never noticed by the coach who sat you on bench. This post is for the girls who were just “one of the guys” and your best friend was actually the love of your life. You would sit there and listen to him talk about his secret crushes and you’d watch him get his heart-broken. You sang every single Taylor Swift song from album 1 to album 3 because they related to every inch of your life. We all know that Teardrops on My Guitar was our anthem. This post is for the girls who didn’t party and didn’t drink in high school. You didn’t show much skin and you weren’t well-endowed in the womanly figure department. You weren’t always well put together on the outside but you were always very well put together on the inside. This post is for the girls who had their hearts broken multiple times and somehow you kept it all together when everyone else thought for sure that you would fall completely apart. You were played by the “older boy” but you didn’t know it yet while you watched him play on the baseball team. He talked to you while he talked to your best friend simultaneously. He broke your friendship (at the time), he ruined your confidence, and he destroyed your idea on high school love. This post is for the girl who was finally noticed by someone. You were shocked that the boy whose science class that was next to yours your sophomore year noticed you. You’d silently walk behind him in the hallways wondering every step what he was thinking about in that beautiful head of his. He became your first true love and you saw your entire future in his blue eyes. He was your first public kiss because all the others were hidden. He was your first hand hold in the hallways. This post is for the girls who gave that first love a piece of you that you’ll never get back. Whether it be as heart shattering as your virginity or maybe just your heart in general. He crushed your entirety and he ran it over with his big lifted truck. This post is for the girl who let her heartbreak make her bitter for a long time. You wished that love never existed and therefore you didn’t allow anyone else to ever love you again because surviving the first heartbreak was hard enough. So you looked for fake love. The kind that is cheap and isn’t supposed to hurt. But again, you end up just as sad as before.

This post is for the girls who were going to completely give up. We’ve all said once, “I’m never dating again till I’m like 30 or something.” But God had other plans for you all along. Because this post is for the girls who HAVE found and for the girls who WILL find the MAN that God created for you, not the boy.

You will be put back piece by piece. You will be told every single day that YOU ARE ENOUGH. You are so much more than enough. You will feel secure again. You will feel confident again. Your beauty will shine and he will see it. He will embrace it. This post is to tell you that you will be loved. That surviving your first heartbreak of many will be hard. But my sweet girl, it’s worth it. When the man comes along in your life, he will flip it upside down and it will all make sense. Happily Ever After doesn’t just have to be a fairy tale that we read as young girls. It can be reality. It will be reality.

This post is to tell you to wait, be patient, pray hard, hold your heart close, and know that someone out there right this second is looking for someone exactly like you. So don’t change. Don’t let that high school boy change you. Don’t let the valleys stop you from the high peaks. Real love is worth the wait. So hold on girl. I know how hard it is, but hold on.

“Be the kind of woman who doesn’t spend her days worrying about the future because she knows that no matter what does or doesn’t happen this week, this semester, or this year, God will still fulfill His promises to her.”

Xoxo

4.5

“I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.” – Song of Songs 6:3

I was going through old photos today and ran across this one. I can’t believe that my husband and I have been together for 4.5 years. It doesn’t seem like that much time has passed already from two little 18 year olds too nervous to hold hands to two 23 year olds who are married and bought a house together. 

Throughout these 4.5 years, Anthony has shown me the definition of true love. As cheesy as it may sound. He’s constantly proving that someone can come into my life and no matter how much I fail, he won’t leave. He is every single prayer answered. He is everything that is good in this world. I’ve yet to meet someone who hasn’t said, “I really like Anthony.” Because he is a wonderful friend and a friendly conversation. 

When I think back to our first few moments together, I would never have thought we’d be where we are today. God truly has had His hands upon this relationship. He continues to bless us both individually and as a whole. I know deep in my heart that Anthony was created perfectly for me. He balances me out, and he completed the empty parts of my being. He’s brave and outgoing where I’m more shy and I’m scared of everything. He’s good with numbers and well-rounded with knowledge. He’s strong and grounded. 

He’s the leader of our small family and he puts the Lord as our foundation. Always seeking Him first in all we do. He is my unborn children’s father who already loves them with all his heart. 

4.5 years of laughter, valleys and peaks, tears, hard work, and falling easily. He’s 4.5 years of smiles on my face and happiness in my heart.

Anthony, I pray for 4.5 million more years with you. Thank you for loving me so fiercely and so honestly. You’re definitely my better half. 

Young Love

I believe in young love. 

I believe in marriages under the age of 25, I believe in high school sweethearts, I believe in young military couples, and I believe in soulmates. 

The thing is, no one gets to tell you when you’re ready to be in love nor who you get to fall in love with. They can’t tell your heart, “you aren’t ready” because your heart already knows you are. It knew the moment your significant other talked to you for first time and your heart did this fluttering feeling and words didn’t form right out of your mouth. You were starstruck and your heart was saying, “Lord have mercy.” Meanwhile, God was doing a little jig upstairs because you had found the person He created for you. 

I believe in young couples who know they don’t have to date 10 people to find the 1 person they want to spend forever with. I believe in young couples who get married in their early twenties sometimes even younger, and while the rest of their friends think they’re crazy, I’m applauding them. 

Some of my friends thought it was crazy that I married at 21 years old. That I hadn’t lived life enough to know that Anthony was my dude forever. That I hadn’t experienced enough because I didn’t want to sleep around with guys and instead chose one guy to fall asleep to every night for the rest of my life. They thought I was insane when I was 18 years old (when I first started dating Anthony) and I told them I knew I would marry him one day. But I didn’t think it was strange or weird at all. It was right. It was right from the beginning and from the first time I looked into those huge brown eyes. It was right when my heart fluttered and words didn’t form right out of my mouth so I just listened to him talk instead. It was right when minutes felt like hours because time was endless around him. It was right when he placed a ring on my finger and it was right when I said I DO. 

I believe in young couples who have their lives together. Hear me young wives and husbands when I say there is nothing wrong with you. Your friends will think differently of you because you’re married. They will stop inviting you to certain things and they won’t be around as often. Don’t worry. It’s not because they stopped liking you once your last name changed or once you became “tied down.” You’re just in a different phase of life and one day they will join you. And they will see and understand the true awesomeness that marriage is. But in the mean time, love them and remind them they aren’t forgotten just because you’re married. And I think they will return that feeling to you too. 

But also know that it’s ok to say no and stay home with your spouse or do things just with your spouse. It’s not a crime to not want to go out and party when your spouse isn’t home. It’s ok to want to stay home and watch reruns of Friends and eat tacos with your spouse when your friends want to go do something. Your marriage is important and it’s the most important relationship you have. But friendships are important too, so make sure to make time for them. 

I am extremely grateful I met Anthony as young as I did. I get to love him longer and growing up together has been so much fun. Whether I was 18 or 55, I would have picked Anthony. I knew from the get-go he was who I wanted. 

Young love is real and it’s good. I hope you find your true love and they bring you all the happiness in the world. I know that I wouldn’t change a thing about mine. 

Did you meet your spouse at a young age? I would love to hear your story 🙂 Comment below! 
I pray God continues to bless each and every young couple and marriage. 💕
Always from my heart, 

Bryce